In Today’s Journal
* My Quote of the Day
* Even More Nitty Gritty on Description
* Of Interest
* The Numbers
My Quote of the Day
“Why do I focus on character and setting? Because maybe 10% of a fiction is comprised of events and those take place in a setting. The other 90% is the characters’ reactions to that event, which also take place in a setting.” Harvey
Even More Nitty Gritty on Description
This is another long post.
This scene is set in the suite in the hotel. The time runs from 3 to 6 a.m. They’ve just entered the suite.
Deep description isn’t always necessary, but the primary purpose of this scene is to enable the reader to feel the building tension. Setting is a huge part of that. Again, I want to bring the reader into the suite with the characters.
By the way, I gave up trying to indent first lines of paragraphs etc. in these excerpts. It’s difficult to do in WordPress—plus they still skip a space between paragraphs—and Substack won’t do it at all, so….
Inside on the left was a couch upholstered in tan leather. Beyond it, a hallway led past the kitchen area on the right. There was a door just past the kitchen and another at the end of the hallway.
In the living room were all the typical furnishings: the couch and a coffee table, two easy chairs with side tables, a large flat-screen television mounted on the wall, and a separate table about the size of a single-pedestal desk with a desk chair on either end.
Like the couch, the other upholstery was tan leather, the carpeting brown, the wood light oak.
Dot pointed at the larger table and the desk chairs. “That’s where we’ll do our business.”
I only nodded.
In the kitchen was a small fridge, then a two-burner hotplate on a counter, then a corner and a small double sink, a coffee maker—the carafe was already full and steaming—then a microwave oven.
I set my bag on the couch. “Whenever you’re ready. I just wanna fill my mug again. You want more?”
“Thanks.” She handed me her mug. “Black’s fine, but just set it by the coffee maker for now. First I’m gonna get a shower. Then I’ll get my stuff and meet you at the table. Unless you want to shower too.”
I only shook my head. “I’m good. I’ll get one later.” As she receded down the hallway, I dropped on the couch, picked up the remote, and turned on the television. I was surprised to see many of the menu listings were in English.
*
After a ten or fifteen minutes of browsing the menu, I clicked off the TV, got up and poured Dot a mug of coffee, and carried it to the table.
I’d just sat down at the far end of the table—the better to see the front door—when she exited the hallway again, still rubbing her hair with a towel and carrying some folders in her other hand.
She’d changed into green pants and a green halter top. The same white leather sandals were still on her feet. She tossed the towel to the side—it landed half-on and half-off the coffee table—then laid a thick folder and two thinner ones on the table between us and sat down. She sipped her coffee. “So how’s Aspen? You guys doing all right?”
“Sure.” I shrugged. “You know. We have the normal stuff all couples go through but we’re all right.”
She seemed to search my eyes for a second, then said, “Good. Good to hear.” She hesitated. “By the way, I, uh, took the bedroom at the end of the hall when I checked in. It has the ensuite, but I’ll trade with you if you’d rather—”
I put up one hand and smiled. “No, that’s fine. You can keep it. I’m good anywhere.”
She canted her head, a light smile on her lips. “Good. Okay. Thanks.” She took a breath. “Okay, we have a lot to get through. Shall we?” She reached for one of the two slimmer folders and passed it to me.
I nodded and opened the folder. It was filled with a stack of photos.
“The first part will be all you.” She pointed at the open folder. “Those are surveillance photos of Enrique Primos, and then there are a few of Jorge Santos. The other thin folder contains photos of some of the other contestants. We might or might not have to hit them too. Okay?”
I glanced up. “Sounds good.”
She jerked a thumb over her shoulder. “Okay, I’ll leave you to that while I put together some breakfast. Are you hungry?”
I grinned. “I could eat.”
As she got up and turned away, she said, “Sausage patties and eggs all right?”
“Perfect.”
And so, about the time the clock registered 3:30 a.m., we began our journey to put Enrique Primos et al on ice with me bent over a folder full of photos and Dot playing Ms. Homemaker in the kitchen.
*
By 4 a.m. Primos’ face was seared into my mind from every angle. I mostly had Santos’ face memorized too. Dot didn’t seem overly worried about Santos, but I’ve learned never to discount a target.
There was a light clatter as Dot set our plates on the island and smiled. “Come get it. We’ll eat over here if that’s okay. I like to keep business and whatever else separate.”
I rolled my chair back a little. “Works for me.” I stretched, then got up, walked to the island, and pulled out a stool.
As we ate, there was only the clacking of silverware on the plates and the quiet sounds of sipping coffee. Finally I said, “So in the plane you said ‘we,’ right? That things developed faster than ‘we’ expected?”
She looked up. Her fork, filled with eggs and a bit of speared sausage, hovered over her plate. “Yes?”
“So who else is involved in the operation? Is it all right to ask?”
“Of course.” She shrugged and looked down. “Just a few members of my team.” She took a bite and started chewing.
“Ah, okay.”
She swallowed, then picked up her coffee mug. “They were—well, they still are—involved, but mostly in the surveillance.” She sipped from her mug, then held it between both hands. “In fact, I expect one of them—Grouse—to stop by in the morning.” She took another sip, then set the mug on the island. “Tomorrow morning. Sometime.”
I nodded and we continued eating.
Afterward, she picked up both plates and carried them to the sink.
She looked up, surprised and a slight frown on her face as I joined her. “Oh, you don’t have to—”
“No, I’ll help.” I hesitated. “I usually help Aspen.”
She only nodded.
After we’d cleaned the dishes and put them away, the kitchen clock read 5:20 a.m. “I’ll take my bag to my bedroom and unpack. Then I think I’ll call Aspen to let her know I made it. She should be up by—”
Dot jerked her head around to look at me. “Oh, I’m sorry, Sam. You can’t do that.”
“Excuse me? Why not?”
“TJ didn’t mention it? There’s no communication with the outside while we’re here. This mission is just too sensitive.”
“But I wouldn’t say—”
She put up one hand. “No no, it isn’t about what you would say or not say. It’s technology. They can track cell phone signals. And you never know when the phone in your room is bugged or they have a bug elsewhere. We just can’t risk it. No outside contact. That’s SOP for any Delta Force op.”
Okay, that makes perfect sense. SOP—standard operating procedure—is kind of like best practices. The SOP is a kind of bible you follow to minimize screwups. It provides normalcy in abnormal times and situations. “Oh.” I shrugged. “Okay.”
Dot only looked at me for a moment. “I’m really sorry, Sam. I thought TJ would have told you.”
“He didn’t, but it’s okay. It’s not a big deal.” I gestured toward the table and the folders. “Then I’ll just—”
“Yes, please. And once you have the photos of Primos and the others in mind, we’ll start on the heavier stuff.”
Of course, as it turned out, all of this is slow-paced stuff is leading up to an explosion of sorts as another character, a member of Dot’s Delta Force team, comes into the room.
If you’d like to see that explosion and meet that character, let me know in the comments or via email and I’ll share another excerpt. Otherwise I probably won’t bother.
Talk with you again soon.
Of Interest
Police warn about dangerous look-alike candy ahead of Halloween Consider this my public service announcement of the day.
The Numbers
The Journal………………….. 1470
Mentorship Words…………….. 1130
Total Nonfiction…………………. 2600
Writing of Blackwell Ops 50: Sam Granger | Rocky Ground
Day 1…… 1440 words. To date……… 1440
Day 2…… 2986 words. To date……… 4426
Day 3…… 3523 words. To date……… 7949
Day 4…… 3315 words. To date……… 11264
Day 5…… 4128 words. To date……… 15392
Fiction for October………………………… 74380
Fiction for 2025…………………………… 652918
Nonfiction for October.…………………… 26840
Nonfiction for 2025………………..……… 236950
2025 consumable words………………… 882299
2025 Novels to Date…………………….. 16
2025 Novellas to Date…………………… 0
2025 Short Stories to Date……………… 36
Novels (since Oct 19, 2014)…………….. 120
Novellas (since Nov 1, 2015)…………… 10
Short stories (since Apr 15, 2014)……… 310
Short story collections……………………. 29